Wednesday, June 20, 2007

On Being Single

A short conversaton with a patient yesterday afternoon while working in his mouth.

Patient: So how old are you?
Me: 30
Patient: (gasp) 30 and not married yet?
Me: uh huh
Patient: Don't you want to be married?
Me: Sure, to the right person.
Patient: You should look for a husband.
Me: Say what!?

(Sigh) I get this alot especially from the Filipinos and there are ALOT of Filipinos on this island. Apparently if you're not married before the age of thirty you are considered to be an "Old Maid" in the Filipino culture. One word: stupid. I'm not in a hurry to get hitched considering the high divorce statistics that 50 percent of first marriages fail and 60 percent of second remarriages fail. I'd rather be single and happy than be married to the wrong person and miserable. How is that inconcievable to some?


MJ said...

Patient: So how old are you?
Manang J: 30
Patient: (gasp) 30 and not married yet?
Manang J: that's right!
Patient: Don't you want to be married?
Manang J: Maybe. It depends if the guy has a great job, good morals, great personality......... blah, blah, blah
Patient: You should look for a husband
Manang J: You should get a life and dont' worry about mine, I'm happy where I am right now. *****
Manang J: This patient needs their teeth pulled so they don't talk to me no longer.

Talk to you ya.

marianas life said...

Or how about, once you've been married for 10 years and no kids. That is really inconceivable and the comments and shock are borderline insensitive. I usually end up feeling like there must be something really wrong with me because a. we can't conceive and b. i don't really want to be pregnant. i'm totally happy with adoption and parenting through less conventional means.

the reaction to you and me is like the reaction i get when i say our dogs are spayed. "better to let them have puppies". better for whom and for what?

Jeff said...

I get the same thing. I'm walking around with Carl and Alex, brown kids, and I get, "so when are you having kids." I point to them and say, "Do they look like hamsters?" We get this a lot.

Anonymous said...

It's really hard for a man to understand a woman:

2% of Cosmo readers say looks; Just 3% say financial & career success matters the most; 42% say what they really care about is a sense of humor; and 38% say sweetness.

An ex-GF told me that our relationship was 80% passion and 20% practical. She said that her current BF was the opposite. I asked which one was she happier with. She paused for a few moments, and then she said it was unfair for me to ask. Sometimes silence speaks in volumes.

Sometimes it takes a bad car accident to finally get over the last remnants of a bad break up. Sometimes physical pain is easier to bear than the emotional and psychological ones. I am happy and I am single again! God bless, Bev

Sean said...

Marianas Life beat me to it.

I hate, HATE the questions Babs and I get about when are we going to have kids, and when they hear we're married for 10 years and we're in 30's . . .ai adai.

I sympathize with you totally.

And you're right. It's much better to single and happy than to be married for sake of being married.

Don't let them get you down!

Anonymous said...

Good job, Beve. You are a spectacular girl. Not just any guy is good enough for you. God has a special plan for you, and from the way you're sounding, you're right in the middle of it. Keep up the good work.

Melissa said...

How about 33 and single.... My friend in London, who's from India, and I had an interesting conversation about why I wasn't married. She said it was my dad's job to find me a suitable husband. When I told my dad this, he reminded me that the 2 guys he tried to set me up with ended up being gay.

So, here's to being happy with who you are and where you are in life, and trusting that God will bring you someone if and when it's time.

In the meantime... Old Maids Unite!

Kimiko said...

I'm 37, and I got same question soooo many times. Also, they asked me how many kids I have. I said no kids, then they said "oh, you don't want to have a kids?"
I just get tired to answer for these stupid questions.
It's my life, not yours.... right?!

Jesse Wright said...

I agree with you 100% :)

EJ said...

this is funny indeed! Say WHAT???

Bev said...

MJ: Just loved how you inserted your own lines! lol

Bree: Some people just think they know everything, eh?

Jeff: Your comment was so funny! You made me laugh REALLY loud at work!

Annoymous: I'm happy your not wasting your time on people who don't value the great person you are.

Sean: My friends get that remark all the time. The first question is when are you getting married? Then after they get married they start asking . . . when are you having kids? Its never ending.

Graves: Thanks so much for your encouragement. It means alot to me.

Melissa: Cheers to "old maids"! lol

Kimi: you look 27! you're in such great shape!!

Jesse: Looking forward to my NZ trip!=)

EJ: I write the stupidest things, eh?! I thought it was funny too.